THE YEAR'S BEST [actual] HEADLINES OF 2007:
Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
[No, really?]
Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
[Now that's taking things a bit far!]
Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?
[Not if I wipe thoroughly!]
Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
[What a guy!]
Miners Refuse to Work after Death
[No-good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-so!]
Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
[Somebody's learnt something from George W Bush!! See if that works any better than a fair trial!]
War Dims Hope for Peace[I can see where it might have that effect!]
If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile[You think?]
Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures[Who would have thought!]Enfield ( London ) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide[They may be on to something!]
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges[You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?]
Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge[He probably IS the battery charge!]
New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group[Weren't they fat enough?!]
Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft[That's what he gets for eating those beans!]
Kids Make Nutritious Snacks[Do they taste like chicken?]
Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half[Chainsaw Massacre all over again!]
Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors[Boy, are they tall!]
And the winner is....Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone to whom you want to bring a smile (Maybe even a chuckle).
Da guyz dat publish dem noosepapers is plenty smart
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